I am doing my very best to write this, because my mom is apparently "too busy" to sit down and write about me. She has "play practice", but I dont know how much you need to practice playing because it seems pretty easy: run in circles, bark, chase my tail, try to eat stuff...she could do it too, but I guess she needs practice.
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| My mom was in a play. Im always in a play...with my bone, my toys, my tail...I guess she was good at playing because she also got flowers for it! |
I tried to figure out what could possibly be more important than paying all of her attention to me, staring at me lovingly, and thanking me for giving her exercise by acting like I have to go outside sixty times a day and then doing nothing but lick the grass or bark at caterpillars. I cant figure out anything, so for now, I guess I will write my own.
My mom is a little bit neurotic. See, she has a full time job and leaves me alone the majority of the day, but because I think things like a blue plastic bone are amusing (and because my short-term memory resets after about seven and a half minutes), its actually okay. I also get to spend time doing two of my favorite things without getting yelled at: biting my own thumbnail, and barking at what mom calls: NOTHINGATALL. NOTHINGATALL is a pretty scary beast that lives above us, below us, outside, in the walls, in the room, under the bed, and in the shower. Sometimes hes outside too. NOTHINGATALL makes all sorts of noises and I think its trying to get in and kill us, so I make it my job to protect us from this evil beast. So far, so good.
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| My reward for protecting us from NOTHINGATALL was CARRIDE...my favorite thing ever! |
Oh yeah, neurotic. My mom has a lot of strange habits which I think go a little overboard, and no matter how much I complain or try to make her stop, she insists on them. Like every morning, and sometimes in the middle of the day, she throws her clothing on the floor so that I can play with them and drag them around the house (she is so thoughtful that way) and climbs into the water box. Its very scary and she totally disappears behind this curtain. It covers her in water and I try to tell her that its very dangerous and try to open the curtain to help her escape, but she doesnt want to and shoos me away. Fine, let her get eaten by the water monster. I dont care.
She also insists on using the loud air gun which she points at her own head. Sometimes she points it at me and it growls and blows hot air at me. I do my best to eat all of the hot air, but I dont always win.
But I love my mom because she takes good care of me, and even if she dresses me up in little outfits, like these:
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| Jail Dog. |
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| Pumpkin Dog |
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Christmas Dog
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.....I know she still loves me lots. We had a special day yesterday where there was a sparkly tree:
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| Im not allowed to eat anything off of it. I dont get it. |
...and there were a bunch of gifts, even some for Milo! We took a bunch of walks...
....and by the end of the day, I was so tired!
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| ZzzzzzzzZzzzzzzz. |
Merry Christmas, Everyone!
A post from Milo Why I love my dog mom even though she is neurotic and sometimes cranky
